Sunday, June 16, 2013


Visualize it with not an ounce of doubt and live in the -FEELING- & 'Be'ingness of gratitude and the -KNOWING- that it already Is.
Go on. Create, creator. ~


Friday, September 28, 2012

Minions VS. The Unknown

…the unknown –well it’s simply beautiful~

It’s been a while, a {good} while I might add. {Might? You just did…Silly.}Since I’ve been gone I’ve poisoned myself in the middle of nowhere, cultivated these amazing talents and I’ve learned so much about whom and what I Am. {I like to throw in the poisoning to evoke thought but it is a true story, more on that later.} Any who - The learning process never ends – or at least it shouldn’t. {I have found too that although I am great at public speaking my thoughts are better laid out in words. Or at least this is {my} perception. That or it could be that I don’t have to be around others’ energies to get the point across and this allows for ease of writing – who knows.}. To bring it back, since I have been gone, {I have grown.}

{A quick rundown of how I got to this very September day – lets’ see what I forget~}

When I left what I call my five year experiment, {which started as such in 2008}as it was one the most transformative and informative times I’ve had in my life; I was not exactly sure what I was going to do next, all I knew is that I was at a point in my life where I was completely on board with {not knowing} because what I already knew – {…the EVERYTHING I was living; my robotic schedule of confinement and ridicule, working with some of the murkiest of beings [energy wise]- and the psychological *phuck endured (& ignored btw) due to the monotonousness and lack of heart in it all}was not where my Light wanted to be or could stand to be any longer. Toward the end of it I had learned so much about homeopathy and meditation and everything in between that I {knew with all of my heart} that {not knowing} was the way to go. –It has saved me.

My interest in how things work and why they work does not by any means exclude myself. {If anything this is where it is amplified. I want to know more.} As far as I can remember I have felt ‘different’, and I guess this ‘difference’knew how to protect itself because it wasn’t something that I would talk {or do talk much}about because innately I knew no one would understand and for the most part those closest to me still do not. An open mind however can grasp what I’m trying to bring.

So in my ‘experiment years’ I have come to learn that people who are insecure and afraid feed off the insecurities and fears of those who are just like them, those who are not like them can fall victim to these energy vampires too…they do not care who they belittle as this has become the norm to them. It’s a sick culture. {Maybe even worse than POP culture. This is how ‘clicks’ or ‘groups’ are formed – however you spell it.} “Dog eat dog” is the “reality” of this façade.{Its’ truly sickening} But the BIGGEST thing I came to learn and have really always known {just kinda hoped it would have stopped somewhere in adulthood} is that if you are not like “them” you are – out- its’ ‘that’ simple. It really is. {if anything this shit just gets worse as adults – I would think so due to it being easier to program those who don’t educate themselves or expand their phucken minds if only for a moment- people at this frequency feel its “easier” NOT to think and simply “follow” the crowd }Now in my learning’s I was introduced to ‘manipulating reality’. {Sounds creepy when I put it that way-NOT my intention, I promise} For example: One day in this façade of a life, my numbers {as it was ALL I was to these minions}were phenomenal and I was pleased but received no recognition {but if shit is hitting the fan you better believe recognition is being given –( its’ funny to see that the word “recognition”holds such a different meaning to me this very moment than when I was living this robotic lie) –How Beautiful I FEEL!} until a woman very close to the head honcho came to give me my recognition, this was my moment-I accepted her recognition and she in turn would be the unknowingly messenger of ‘my message’ to the head honcho minion. I was mindful of my word choices and the impact they would make {which do not matter – all that matters is that I KNEW whatever I said would be repeated and having known the monotony of these people – if you even want to call them that – made them so predictable!} and like clockwork I could hear the conversation. Lets’ just say being there as long as I was and knowing these kind of people for that long I knew where I stood and it was not [in]. {Thank God!}

I’ve never been one for the [in crowd]. {The oddity with this is that I have an award for being in the [in crowd] – LMFAO…just thought about that (obviously)}

So when I left I felt like the next phase in my metamorphosis took place the second I stepped through that door to leave. I seriously felt like I could fly! I didn’t want to be ‘stuck’ and I was no longer stuck. {I think they slowly kill souls there and then eat it at fancy banquets that only the TOP head honchos attend and maybe the minion honchos too, depending on how many souls they’ve single handedly suffocated that month…LOL ok that was a bit dramatic but dammit its real!}

Since I’ve been gone my health has improved, my mood has improved, I’m happier and it physically shows. This is how I have chosen to manipulate my reality. I’ve chosen to live a higher frequency. like I said...
…the unknown –well it’s simply beautiful~

Saturday, July 7, 2012

There is More to Come

<3...I'm Awake.                                                                                                                      The Question is.....are You?

Thursday, June 14, 2012


I always said I would get married at least 4 timesit wasn’t (isn’t) to demean marriage and what it stands for - because that is all 'perspective', but it came (comes) from a place of /knowing/ 'me'....and I love that. <3.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Be Awake to See and Aware to Endure

John Kehoe came into my life when I was about 17, then I came across Gary Zukav for the first time when I was 19 - I had no idea of what importance they had in my life until recently - same goes with Wayne Dyer who I came across at age 24, along with, Deepak Chopra, René Descartes, José Argüelles, Carlos Castaneda, along with so many other Beautiful Lights; and it’s interesting the way I come across information, people and, circumstances– They are all clues, I believe. Hardly ever do I start to read a book beginning to end – I open it knowing I will find exactly what I never knew I was looking for. It’s ALWAYS the case.  Randomly whom I needed or what I needed-knowingly or not, would and still comes into my life at just the right moment. When you are able to look at the bigger picture and see yourself as a thread in this canvas of life – you see why people come into (and out of) your life, you see that you are a part of something Beautiful and Enormous (!) and without You it does not exist. When you know that – how can one not share? Watch life with a loving eye – speak with a mindful heart, and love with all of your existence. Take nothing for granted and know that EVERY experience you have – there is a lesson to be learned, and everyone you come to meet has a gift for you and you for them – so Be Awake  to See and Be Aware to Endure.

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

You’d Be Surprised at How Contagious It Is

What if we just all got along and chose to Be happy? Wouldn't it be easier? Absolutely!
It’s as though we jump at the chance to belittle someone, to prove, for no reason at all, that we are somehow better than they. Instead of choosing to see that people are doing their best at their level of awareness and allowing the situation to ‘roll off your back’, if you will, you choose to react; you behave in the same way. Why?  Instead of entertaining the situation, change it. Choose to be above it. It may sound cliché but it’s something taught from a very small age, ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all’.  Don’t react to the negative situation, person, happening etc. Know that you can choose to respond in a way that comes from your heart – not your head.  Now your ego will want to protect you – it’s what it does, and when you feel this about to happen or already happening – take it back, you are more than your ego. If you are content with being upset all the time – then there is no need to worry about work – you require no change. Now if you are done with wasting precious energy on being upset and would rather find a purpose for it – get ready for some work! J We are creatures of habit and learning to undo a lifetime of habit ties for first with being a mother as the hardest and most beautiful things I could have ever imagined…and it’s just the beginning. Choose to be HAPPY, choose to be your own light; You’d Be Surprised at How Contagious It is~ those around you will love you for it – let us hope they mimic that.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

I Made My Neighbor Tortillas Today

The neighbors son comes over to check on Gabriel today, and I offer him something to drink or eat, he says no and continues on to say that if he becomes hungry he will simply go to his house because was he told by his dad not to offer food to guests at his home, as he was only providing food for those living under his roof, and if he did it again, he would be grounded for a month, so he is trying to not take from anyone else. {But you are not taking, I’m offering to give, were my thoughts} I was looking at him in confusion considering the openly religious nature of this family – I was, surprised.  (Who has me “stereotyping” anyway.)
I went on to think about how my children’s interactions were when they went over there. In our home, anyone who comes in is asked if they are hungry or would like something to drink – that is the norm for me – I grew up with that. Anyone who can relate knows that when you walk into your Abuela’s house, before you get to even sit, she has already placed the tortillas and beans and everything else she has on the table, and you have no choice but to eat! (lol) So when they go over and they are confronted with this – I wondered how they handle it. Ultimately I know they will be fine and they will learn their boundaries when it comes to others and how they run their households, but I hope they see that giving is so much better than not, and when you hold onto a belief, let it have the foundation of love; hold it whole and hold it honestly~